The more I experience life, the more I learn that I really am still a young girl figuring out who she is, where she stands, and just in gerneal….making her way through life. I am learning as I go, and I’m happy to say that I don’t know everything. It does take level of humility to go through this life, embracing experiences and things, learning from them, yet always holding my relationship with the Lord at my center as my core foundation.
Nothing has taught me this more than the election, and where I am in life right now. I am not normally a person that openly discusses politics, religion, or any hot topic that will start an argument. This isn’t because I’m a sweet and incredibly nice person that dislikes arguing lol…..it’s because I’m fearful. Fearful of not having an answer to those that disagree with my faith, fearful of not being able to accurately defend myself or my beliefs, fearful of being wrong, fearful of people not liking me for my opinion…..the list goes on.
However, things in my life are changing daily and I know that God is calling me out from being the quite, fearful girl who lives inside of herself. He’s calling me to LIVE. To be bold, and to be courageous. And that is coming in sooo many forms. Specifically, it’s coming in the form of me speaking the things that are in my heart and not allowing fear to hold me captive. So if that means speaking out on my feelings on abortion, racism, or politics, then so be it.
This is a scary place to be for me because I’m used to being crushed and falling to pieces when people hit a place inside of me that is soft. I’m used to closing myself off when I’m hurt. There’s so much that God is teaching me in this season that there’s no way I could sum it up in one thing, but I can say that he is unveiling me. He’s teaching me not to hide. He’s teaching me to speak up for myself and to trust his voice inside of me. He’s making my calling and election sure. He’s allowing me to experience the true freedom and the life that he died so I could have.
It’s an interesting place to be in, and there are so many unknowns, but I trust that he’s with me.